Rigid things eventually break with enough pressure or their use is limited by their sturdy but fixed nature. Same thing is true for rigid people. They’re thrown off by minor changes, overwhelmed in imperfect settings, and broken by genuine disruptions. Being rigid is a fragile position for a person.
Flexible people, on the other hand, operate with the obvious understanding that the world is an unpredictable place and every scenario involves elements that do not meet your preferred style, do not match your expectations, and do not measure up to your standards.
The simple skill of flexibility is adjusting your approach to fit the context and your style to fit the people, without lowering your standards, in order to achieve your objective.
Self-awareness
You know when you are willing to consider alternatives beyond your strongest feeling or first choice and when you’re not. Your style may be right or it may not, but if you don’t have the awareness to consider your circumstances, habits, and impact, you’ll never be right enough.
Self-discipline
Most people still equate discipline with rigidity, when the truth is that discipline both requires flexibility and gives you more of it. It doesn’t require discipline to be fixed, rigid, and unchanging. It only requires stubbornness, ignorance, and a closed mind.
Saying no to impulses, trying new approaches, and considering alternatives options are all acts of self-disciplined flexibility. The rigid person acts from default out of impulsive, autopilot habit. The flexible person acts from discipline out of intentional, purposeful choices.
Self-confidence
You don’t have to be one thing all the time and you don’t have to be every thing to everyone. Know your strengths and lean into them. Put yourself in position to use them well, but remember that no strength works in every setting. Weaknesses, especially style issues, are usually overused strengths or used in the wrong context. Plan ahead for how and where your strengths can undermine you through misuse and think ahead about how you will use flexibility with discipline to adjust.
Do the work.
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