Choosing the wrong target for change

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Brian Kight

You’re wasting energy trying to change the wrong things. And until you stop, reset, and switch the target of your focus, you’ll keep getting disappointing results.

Remember the two forces that create every outcome in your life:

  1. The event (including all the variables in it)
  2. Your response

Every outcome is a consequence of the combination and interaction of those two forces. Events and your response.

Creating different outcomes, whether brand new or bringing a change to an existing outcome, means that something in the contributing forces must change. Something must change in the event or in your response. Or both.

But when we want a different outcome, too often we make the mistake of trying to change the wrong variable. We try to force the event to change through blame, complaining, defensiveness, authority, manipulation, or waiting. All dead ends.

Events can and do change, but they change like the wind. Unpredictably, uncontrollably, and on their own timeline. You don’t have the power to command the wind. You have the power to sense the wind, observe its patterns, see its effect, and make your choices.

If you want a different outcome, don’t yell at the wind and don’t wait for it to change.

The wind will do what the wind does. Events will do what events do. Feel the wind of events and adjust your response to hit your targets.

Event + Response = Outcome. Do the work.

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