Hidden Under The Surface

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Brian Kight

For the most part you don’t hear people’s best, deepest, most well-formed thoughts and perspectives. You get what people are willing to say that won’t expose them to too much criticism or the possibility of offending someone who escalates the issue into unwanted adversity or crisis.

There is always more that goes unsaid than said. More under the surface than being displayed. More to people’s intentions than we observe.

The challenge is we’re not sure what else is going on inside a person. That makes us susceptible to assumptions. Assumptions make us susceptible to false confidence. Contrary to popular belief, you do not have a well developed skill to read people’s minds and accurately interpret their intentions. To the extent you do it, you create more problems than you solve.

The discipline to interact with humility is paramount. There is a world of mental and emotional activity just under the surface of every person you interact with and you do not have access to the full and true content of that activity. Everything beyond that is a guess by you. An unconfirmed guess.

Treat that with the humility it deserves. Treat people with autonomy and respect for the human experience. You do not have access to their intentions. You have assumptions. Never, ever confuse your assumptions about people’s intentions with the truth of their intentions. They are not the same.

Bring discipline to the assumptions you make about others with the same rigor you’d like them to bring discipline to the assumptions they make about you.

Answer the call. Do the work.

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DAILY DISCIPLINE

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