Honesty isn’t one size fits all. There are versions of honesty. The degree, depth, and amount of honesty is highly dependent on the people involved, the context, and the consequences, real or perceived.
Being honest is our natural preference. If you’ve spent much time around young kids then you know this. They’re naturally honest. Sometimes painfully. They point out that your teeth are a color other than white. They tell the grandparents what you explicitly told them not to tell the grandparents. They announce what they just did in the bathroom and proudly explain how much of it there was.
These moments of pure honesty are only awkward for adults, not kids. Adults have learned discretion. Kids just know the truth of what they see, feel, and experience and honestly express it. Only through conditioning, intentional or unintentional, do kids learn new habits and standards for honesty.
That conditioning continues today for each of us. Society’s standards of acceptable and unacceptable honesty are constantly evolving even if yours aren’t. Our society is more openly honest now about so many important things. At the same time, our society is less openly honest about other important things. As I’ve explained before, this is not a new development, just a version of it we’re alive to experience.
Nobody thinks of themselves as a dishonest person. Still, we choose what to be honest about, how honest to be, and when. We learn through conditioning to justify our dishonesty in the name of discretion. I think this awareness is worthy of your attention and of further conversation with important people in your life.
Answer the call. Do the work.
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