Is this the world’s best negotiator?

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Brian Kight

When you anticipate discomfort, your brain goes into negotiation mode. It requests your attention, presents arguments, and makes a case against doing the uncomfortable thing, even when you previously committed or know it's necessary.

When you negotiate with yourself, you know all the persuasive points you're most likely to believe, don't you? No one is better at talking you out of something than you.

If you engage in this internal negotiation – if you even entertain it for one second – you lose. Why?

Because now, you have to present a compelling and convincing counter-argument for discomfort that is better than the argument against discomfort. Once the negotiation starts, one of those decisions must prevail.

Which argument usually wins that negotiation?

What is your win/loss record in the last year of negotiating with yourself related to doing uncomfortable things?

You cannot give your internal negotiator attention and allow it to present its case. If you do, you'll lose. Recognize that and shut it down before it starts. You are unwilling to negotiate, unwilling to compromise.

The negotiator isn’t even you, anyway. Not the real you, the decisive you, the disciplined you. It's your programming, your patterns. And they're attempting to rip the controls from your hands so they can take charge.

When you feel the negotiator coming, remind yourself, "I don't negotiate. I act."

The time is now. Do the work.

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