Uncover Unhealthy Relationship Patterns

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Brian Kight

Countless stuff fills your life. Stuff like the shoes you’re wearing, why you bought them, how you chose them and not a different style or brand, and what you believe that says about you.

Stuff like the TV shows you watch, books you read, teams you root for, food you love, vacations you like to take, people you know, cars you drive, music you listen to, apps you use, and the list goes on forever.

You have a relationship with all the stuff in your life. I say stuff to mean the innumerable things that occupy your time, not just in activity, but in mental attention. 

Anything you give attention, time, and energy to plays a role for you. It serves a purpose and you have a relationship with it. Like every relationship, healthy and unhealthy dynamics are going to form.

I believe it’s important to understand what purpose the things in your life serve and whether that purpose adds or detracts from your mission, your contribution, and your satisfaction.

At minimum it’s worthy of consideration, observation, and a few intentional questions:

  1. What is the purpose of this in my life?
  2. How much of it do I need in order to be ok? How much to be maximally fulfilled?
  3. For this to have the role in my life I want, what other things will have a diminished role and impact?
  4. Could I replace some portion of my lower purpose activities with higher purpose activities?
  5. If I scaled back, but didn’t eliminate, some lower purpose activities and scaled up some higher purpose activities, what net positives might happen and what net negatives might be minimized or avoided entirely?

You decide what gets a role in your life and what doesn’t. Purpose is a personal choice. You decide the relationship you form and develop with stuff. Some relationships need to be formed from scratch. Some need to end for good. Some relationships need adjustments. Some need a renewal.

Answer the call. Do the work.

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DAILY DISCIPLINE

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