If you use E+R=O (I highly recommend you do), remember this when choosing how to respond to anything: minimize the harm while maximizing the benefit.
Thinking in sequence, first prioritize minimizing harm. Don't make a situation worse with your response, and don't allow a situation to get worse by your non-response. Within those simple guidelines, do your best to maximize the benefits created through your response.
Many people confuse discomfort for harm. Don't make that error. Harm is unnecessary damage or damage with no upside. Surgeons cut open patients to perform life-saving surgery only when necessary.
Surgeons do their best to minimize the harm while maximizing the benefit. Some damage and discomfort are often required to realize the benefit, even for minor surgical procedures. It's part of the oath all medical professionals are required to take.
Discomfort created through disciplined responses in pursuit of a greater benefit differs from harm produced by undisciplined reactions. Disciplined discomfort is awkwardness, inconvenience, displeasure, or sometimes pain that stabilizes a situation, upholds a principle, or has future benefits. It is net positive.
Too often, people attempt to minimize harm by eliminating discomfort. This approach always — without exception — lowers the benefit and increases the risk and likelihood of more damage.
You can't eliminate all harm, but you can minimize it. Maximizing the benefit of your response depends equally on how you reduce unnecessary harm and embrace disciplined discomfort.
The time is now. Do the work.
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